Downsizing

I'm into my 7th week on Ideal Protein now. I haven't been blogging as much...I think that might be because I've been enjoying life more and haven't found time to sit down. That and besides my girth, my work has been downsizing and I've been under stress about all of that. And, I've taken on another part time thing which is eating my time.

I have been doing well. I have more than 25 pounds off since September. I feel good, I'm done a size. I have more energy, I sleep better. I am happier.

It is worth every single penny.

This program isn't cheap. It is more than I can afford, but I have my mom and sister throwing in to help. But, I would get a second job to keep it going because it is the first thing that ever worked for me and it is just so easy to manage long term. 

Here are five observations I have after 7 weeks and more than $1000 in Ideal Protein food sampling.

Tips for Success

1. It is essential that you don't drink. This has been hard, it is party season. No booze, so hypoglycaemia, no extra strain on liver and kidneys, no impulse eating, no taxis (save $) and sure, the parties aren't so fun. But, clothes shopping remains a better high when I see the numbers go down. 

2. No cheating. I have the occasional splurge. I went for supper and had steak and lobster with a side salad. The 5 oz steak had bacon wrapped around it. I don't fuss when the extra is a little more fat or protein but I have to stay focused to ensure it doesn't creep up and add up. So far, I've been lucky.

3. One restricted a day max, but you don't have to have one every day. Those net carbs add up. 

4. What we buy in grocery stores is not turnip, it is rutabaga. Real turnip is small, cute and white. Rutabaga isn't allowed. It can add a lot of excess carbs. 

5. Tracking matters. 

6. The daily videos help with motivation and the support of friends and family is essential.

7. Water gets harder to drink but it has to stay part of the routine. It is essential to feeling full and maintaining hydration and weight loss. 

Ideal Protein Food Favourites

I have tried many of the foods and I will give them a star rating based on how I like them out of five. I really like most of the food. They do well with replacing the things you want and can come through in a punch when you need a fix of something that feels like a carb. 

Shakes

Vanilla *****

Chocolate*****

Cappuccino*****

Soups

Chicken a La King ****

Tomato Basil **

Mushroom ****

Chicken (not noodle) ***

Chili **** (r)

Pasta

Tomato Basil Rotini ***

Chicken Patties *****

Pudding

Vanilla *****

Banana*****

Chocolate***

Crisps

Dill Pickle Zippers ***** (r)

Salt and Vinegar Soy Crisps *****

Garlic Chive Soy Crisps ****

White Cheddar Puffs ***** (r)

Bars

Chocolate Caramel ***** (r)

Peanut Butter *****

Collagen

Cherry Jello *****

Complete Meals

Chicken Dijonnaise *****

ALCOHOL AND IDEAL PROTEIN

At this posting, I'm down 15 pounds since starting Ideal Protein. Down 18 since the end of summer. And, it feels good. Really good. I've never lost 18 pounds in one go before. This is huge for me. It would take a year on Weight Watchers to even come close to losing 15 pounds and I'd quit frustrated after about 2 months of up .6 and down .4's.

As I get more used to the program, I seem to be blogging less. Of course, not ceasing completely...just taking thoughts as they come in.

I watched a really interesting video today which really capped off my last week or so of life. It was a video from the program about why alcohol is not allowed. I have known some people who seem to drink on the program, and I hear that they get sick and have a bad hangover, but I am not willing to take the chance myself. First, it's a dedication thing. I want to stay on the diet as much as I possibly can to produce the most success. A lifestyle change this expensive should involve changing some "go - to" patterns, like having a drink or 10 at every party I go to.

I have managed to go to a lot of parties on this protocol. I have several different strategies I put into play to make myself enjoy it, and to not be tempted by the food and drinks.

1. Always plan the whole day around the party. I know in advance that I'm going to a party. I check with the host to see what is on the menu and what will be involved. Most of the parties I go to are hippie pot lucks. And, most of the people I know have some sort of food allergy or another to accommodate. So, this usually works in my favour. I have mostly found that not even thinking that I'll eat anything provided is better than thinking I'll try something and that I'll be able to eat something and not come prepared. On Sunday, this was the case, I brought a veggie tray and mostly ate a couple of meatballs and raw veggies. I did nibble one small piece of pakora to sample the cook's talent and had a couple slices of cured meat. All counted as my 8 oz protein and veggies though. 
2. Bring something I like to drink. My treat for myself is a carbonated water with lemon on ice. I always pour it in a glass and I drink 1 Litre bottle at a party. I refill my glass often and people often don't offer me a drink because I have something that looks like one. I do the same in restaurants and outside of this I typically drink water. So, it's pretty refreshing and a nice treat. I have not seen this impact my weight loss at all but I have heard different thoughts on carbonated waters. 
3. Have a plan, Have food. Sometimes I go to a party where the junk and carby food is lined up like a trough! I bring my own snacks, a bag of Ideal Protein Soy Crisps, An Ideal Protein Chocolate Bar, and a bag of cut veggies. Last time, I snacked on my chips and veggies and switched my lunch to the main meal so my Ideal Protein Crisps and veggies was my dinner. Then, I still had room for a bar as the party progressed. 
4. Go Later. Last evening I was invited to another birthday pot luck. I knew the food would be delicious and tempting and lots of strangers all engaged in the eating process. I decided to forfeit the pot luck and go later. I arrived as everyone was finished eating (after eating at home) and enjoyed sitting around and having a chat for the rest of the evening. I still had to decline about 10 offers for dessert but I was able to do so just fine. 

Every weekend there is a new thing going on. This weekend, I got through three. I cheated a little with a few pieces of cured meat and two or three small bits of 3 year old manchego cheese. But, I felt in control and invested in the diet plan. And, ready for anything. I did count the cured meats off of my total ounces but I'm not quite sure where they stand.

But, why no alcohol? 

The calories in alcohol are "empty calories". They provide no nutritional value whatsoever and no cell in the body can use ethyl alcohol as a fuel source. Moreover, alcohol is a toxin which the liver must transform into non-toxic substances. During the weight loss phases of the diet, the liver is "busy" transforming fatty acids into ketonic bodies (ketogenesis) and transforming certain amino acids to glucose as well as the glycerol fractions of triglycerides (ie. gluconeogenesis.) When you drink alcohol, getting rid of this toxin becomes your liver's #1 job and fat burning is compromised...slowing down weight loss and possibly even triggering hypoglycemia (to an extent where you may even pass out). 

In the end, it is just not worth it to me. This diet protocol works because it causes great changes in the body. Changes on a cellular level. The doctors who created the protocol intend for you to not cheat. The foods allowed were chosen thoughtfully for the maximum success and minimum health risks. Ketoacidosis is not to be taken lightly or something for anyone to play with. 

And, that's why I won't drink on the protocol. 

What about other cheats? 

I have been struggling with eating the Ideal Protein Crispy Cereal and the Ideal Protein Restricted flake syle cereal. Adding the water to the powder to create "not milk" creates a by product that I find kind of slimy. I committed to choking these two boxes back until they are done as they cost so damn much. I have heard that almond milk isn't allowed. I did see on this Ideal Protein clinic site that a half cup is okay. I tried 1/2 cup of unsweetened almond milk in my cereal and it was delicious. I was actually sad to finish the last two packs. Now, I'm working through the restricted ones. I posted this to a discussion group and sort of got a bit of flack for it. I do believe, however, that I know what I'm doing and that the person who had the criticism seems to cheat every other week with much bigger things than a 1 carbohydrate, 1 protein and 20 calorie 100ml of milk. I don't think I'll buy the cereal again, but I will use the almond milk as my crutch to get through the last box unless someone tells me a really good reason why not to.

3.5 WEEKS

I almost feel like there's not much to write, but the truth of the matter is that there's always something. The work is sometimes digging in to pull it out.

I have been hungry again lately. Almost like I'm out of ketosis. I've also been not journaling and when I opened the page today, I realize that I fell behind since Friday. Trying to remember what you ate since Friday is very difficult. So, I filled it in as best I could (good thing there's a lot of structure and I've committed to eating the Ideal Protein rice and flaked cereal until it is gone--only 8 packs to go) and committed to doing better going forward.

I think my PMS and hormones are messing with me. I have not had a cycle since September. I have the occasional phantom cramp and appetite fluctuations and bloating. I have been drinking craploads of water and when I go out, I have sparkling water instead of alcohol. I haven't cheated in the typical way, but occasionally the places I am don't have things that are on the diet. For example, I had a Caesar salad at a restaurant last night where the dressing and grated Romano wasn't on the plan. I chose this knowing that I would be choosing fat in lieu of carbs which is less likely to kick me off ketosis. It's not the worst cheat but I am worried about the slide that comes with the little slips here and there. I feel good knowing that I didn't even have a sip of wine and drank 2 litres of sparkling water through the concert. I know it could be worse.

Sometimes I think I am just in too much of a rush to get the weight off and that I am comparing myself to other people's success or weight loss. I have done 11 lbs in 3 weeks. If this stayed consistent, I'd be over the moon.

Already, 3.5 weeks in I need to remind myself to do the following more. If I don't do this, I really wont have any idea if my weight loss (or lack of) is my fault or if the program is really working:

• measure veggies and weigh meat - guess work can cost expensive pounds
• journal everything to track hunger patterns
• get out for a nice walk lunch time 

The weather has been horrible and cold. I've been fighting something. I didn't have the right supplies. All of these are valid excuses but they aren't enough reason to not do this right. 

And, then I need to give myself a break. 

I have just received my order from Low Carb Grocery with lots of goodies like gum, shirataki noodles, 0-0-0 sauces and dressings in packages I can take in my purse. This alleviates the salad issue at restaurants. 

Other people's shit

I was on Facebook today (the best place to go if you are feeling shitty and down about yourself, NOT) and noticed that a friend of mine lost 35lbs this summer. This friend has lots of money, two beautiful kids, a cottage and all kinds of fun toys. She can pay someone to work out for her, or to cook and prep her meals (I don't think she does though). I have another friend who just lost 20 pounds by "stopped eating a big bag of chips every night" while eating at midscale and fine dining at least four days a week.  Of course weight loss comes easy to them! Some people just seem to struggle less in life and that's good, in reality I'm happy for them and would prefer it this way much more than to see them struggle. But, god, I wish I'd get a break sometimes. I mean, I can't do much more here! 

However, it got me to thinking about the past two times I spent time with that one friend and her family. I have had a good connection with her kids. They are very sweet and well behaved. Last Christmas, I was looking after them while the parents were out and when I tucked the older girl into bed and bent over to give her a goodnight kiss on the forehead, she told me I was too fat to bend over. I was dumbstruck. I corrected her that it wasn't nice to say people are fat and that I was quite capable of bending, thank you. I laughed it off as "out of the mouths of babes" but the judgement and awareness bothered me. It bothered me that she knew what fat was and that there could be such a thing as too much of it. She judged me for being overweight. At 8 years old! Then, this past summer, she said she was reluctant to go on the tube behind the jet ski with me because I was too heavy and might sink it (I did wonder about the weight rating of the tow-able but as it is designed for four adults, I decided it would be safe for me and two half-pint kids).

The point of all of this is my curiosity about where this 8 year old obtains these judgements? There is no doubt that she loves me and has no idea how jarring and hurtful those comments could be. There is also no doubt that she speaks similarly to other kids at school who have a weight issue. But, kids don't learn these things on their own. I wonder through her mother's dieting has she learned that fat is something to be despised and that food is to be feared. I really worry about that. 

My shit

I worry about how kids learn and develop these judgements that skinny equals good and fat equals bad. I wonder where anyone develops the notion that overweight people are less than, to be "othered" and that it is obviously their fault for being in that condition. 

While I sit and wonder this, I worry that my particular issues may never disappear and that this diet will be like the long string of others that just don't work. And, that is very scary. 

Ultimately I want to love myself for what's on the inside. And, I want to rid myself of the ideas I have about weight that come from a very complex cycle of development. It was constructed by me and by those I interacted with from an early age. It's also reinforced by my declining popularity as I gain size. I used to be surrounded with shallow people who loved to spend time in my company and fill my house. I would hazard to guess that many of these people are embarrassed to be seen with me as I've creeped higher and higher on the scale. And, perhaps it is not them but my internalization of self criticism and loathing that makes it all just a self-fulfilling prophecy. Every time I am not invited to a party, snubbed by someone I used to know, looked over for a career opportunity/advancement, I blame it on the weight. It doesn't make it true. It's that whole separation between correlation and causation. It could be that I've become so insecure that I don't put off the warmth that drew others in, the confidence that begets confidence in me. There's so much to do here beyond losing weight. 

Regardless, there's a lot of negativity in there. I don't think losing weight is the solution. It alleviates the symptoms but really its a problem that's a lot bigger than me.